“Many a man’s profanity has saved him from a nervous breakdown. ” ~ Henry S. Haskins
My Aunt Patti was always talking about Loretta Lynn, Johnny Cash and Conway Twitty and his little Twitty-birds. She always had a cigarette in her hand, and one of her teased-up Loretta Lynn wigs on her head – the kind which resembled some sort of nest-like bird habitat. Aunt Patti’s hair was pretty much a mystery to me, I never knew what the heck was under there. I guess Aunt Patti just didn’t want to bother with styling her real hair, since I know now that she really does grow her own.
Back in the 70′s my Aunt Patti’s true love was country and western music — and swearing. Aunt Patti would swear in everyday conversation; it just seemed to work for her. If she saw a cop, she called him a friggin’ flat-footed bastard. If the car in front of her didn’t step on the gas immediately at a green light, she’d say “the f*cking light’s not gonna get any greener, ya friggin’ @sshole” and so on.
(Italian Lesson: to swear like a trooper = bestemmiare come uno scaricatore di porto)
If we were at a restaurant with Aunt Patti, before she could say “pass the mother f*ckin’ mashed”, she would always ask the waitress to being a spoonful of their sauce before ordering any saucy dish. She’d turn to us and say, “I need taste their f*cking sauce before I order their friggin’ food; I’m not getting screwed with sh!tty friggin’ sauce here”. Aunt Patti’s colorful raunchiness with the English language always held a high entertainment value, and provided us with something to laugh about the next day.
Now go back to the friggin’ home page: www.madnessmomandme.com.